House Unity
by Poinkychan
Summary: Ginny wonders one day, do the personality traits of each of the houses also apply in the bedroom? Her and Hermione decide to find out...
1. The best laid plans

_**Disclaimer: ** I don't own any of the Harry Potter characters or anything else related to the Harry Potter world. They belong to JK Rowling. I apologise to her for using them to such nefarious ends._

_A.N. – We're just pretending that Cedric Diggory didn't die, ok? Because I think he's too hot to miss out on this opportunity. Hurrah! _

**HOUSE UNITY**

Chapter One

Hermione Granger and Ginny Weasley were sitting in their favourite spot in the common room: two comfortable chairs situated right next to the warm and cosy fire. Ginny was stretched out luxuriously, wiggling her toes against the heat of the flame; whilst Hermione was contentedly curled in her armchair like a cat. The population of the common room was dwindling slowly as the night wore on, most of the students heading to be before they would be unable to awaken themselves for the Hogsmeade weekend the following day. Hermione and Ginny, however, had no intention of sleeping any time soon. It was time for their bi-weekly gossip time. The boys had learnt long ago that there was absolutely no point whatsoever in trying to eavesdrop on said conversations, lest they enjoy being turned into terrifyingly disgusting form of filth, or being attacked by their own mucus.

As the room was almost empty, Ginny looked up from the book she was reading and turned to her friend,

"Hermione, do you think the sorting hat was right this year? That we really should be trying for "house unity" and all that? I mean, I know its dark times… and I know that nobody trusts each other in the houses…" she trailed off, looking uncertain with her own ideas.

Hermione was chewing her lip slightly, clearly thinking seriously about what Ginny was saying. After a minute, she formed a somewhat hesitant reply,

"I think it's right. I don't see how else we're going to get through this war… but I just don't know how it is possible. I guess us Gryffindors get along alright with the other two houses. But Slytherin? How are we meant to "unite" with that bunch of bigoted prats?"

As she continued speaking, Hermione got more and more passionate, and Ginny began to see signs of a full blown rant and rave looming on the horizon. With this in mind, she decided to quickly steer the conversation back on the track she had intended.

"Do you think there are many inter-house relationships?" She asked with a carefully produced tone, which was somewhere around mild curiosity, masking a deeper, much more sordid interest.

"I know of a few, but not so many. It's awfully hard to meet people that you…connect with… in this school. If there aren't any in your house, you're pretty much lost I guess."

Ginny looked furtively around the room now, noting that she and Hermione were the only ones left. Steeling herself to start their real conversation rolling, she blurted out her question,

"So, you haven't got experience from any house other than Gryffindor?"

Hermione raised a carefully plucked eyebrow,

"Ginny, I think we both know that I have very little experience at all. Not many of my…type… around Gryffindor tower, after all."

Ginny looked at her best friend with a thoughtful expression. She had known for quite a while that Hermione preferred women. In fact, she had known ever since she walked in on her and Parvati about six months before. Surprise was a word which could be applied quite well.

"Hermione, how would you like to conduct a…scientific experiment?"

"Why do I get the feeling that you're being elusive?"

Ginny grinned.

"I think you'll like my experiment, ma chérie. You see, I got the idea from the sorting hat…"

Hermione frowned then, "What, you think shacking up with the other houses is the best way to promote unity? No offence, Gin, but that might just cause problems…"

Ginny gave a slight giggle, and replied, "Well, I hadn't thought about promoting inter-house relations, but now that you mention it… it can't hurt! But no, you see. I was listening to the sorting hat's song, and I wondered to myself… where exactly do all these 'qualities' we have apply? Is it in ever aspect of our personalities?"

Hermione looked at Ginny with dawning comprehension showing in her intelligent eyes.

"What you're asking is… do the qualities our houses are famous for apply –"

"In the sack. Yes." Ginny cut in with a massive grin on her face.

"This, my dear Ginny, could be a very interesting experiment indeed."

An hour later, after much discussion and debate, the two girls had formed a plan. It was complex, devious, and promised to be tremendous fun. Their first port of call had been to develop a hypothesis to base their investigation upon. Hermione, in true bookworm style, developed the following:

_Investigation of House Quality and Unity – Hermione Granger and Ginevra Weasley_

_We hereby hypothesise that a person's sexual attributes correspond accordingly to the qualities which they are described to have as dictated by their house._

_We have produced a list of likely attributes, in Pro and Con form, of each house:_

_Gryffindor:_

_Pros: _

_Likely to be adventurous. _

_Will put in 100 effort_

_Cons:_

_Often show recklessness. Will probably not take into account contraception. Likely to become too "lost in the moment"._

_May… jump the gun, so to speak._

_Hufflepuff_

_Pros:_

_Extremely loyal, likely to focus on satisfying their partner._

_Likely to be highly compassionate and caring. _

_Cons:_

_Generally regarded as the slowest of the 'slowest' of the houses. Although the implications of this could indeed result in great pleasure for the female counterpart, it could also result in lack of interest, boredom, or even indicate a sheer lack of knowledge on the part of the Hufflepuff. A serious con._

_Too loyal? Possibility of clinginess and inability to accept the 'one night stand concept' (see Slytherin cons for antithesis)_

_Ravenclaw_

_Pros:_

_Penchant for knowledge. Likely to know every way in which to make the body respond positively. Excellent._

_Inventive –likely to apply methods other than the obvious to bring pleasure._

_Cons:_

_Though holding a large amount of knowledge, the application of it may be highly 'technical' and 'systematic', lacking the necessary passion._

_Possible that the only way we will get them to engage in sexual intercourse is if we burn the whole library to the ground. Very bookish. Even more so than myself. (Ms. Granger)_

_Slytherin_

_Pros:_

_Very likely to be extremely kinky, dirty and passionate. A definite Pro if you're into that kind of thing. _

_Slytherins are well known for their brusque, upfront, and frankly sexually promiscuous nature. No chance of having post coital "pillow talk" dilemmas when they are not deemed necessary._

_Cons:_

_Known for being devious, power hungry and cunning. Run the risk of being left utterly unsatisfied. They will take what they want and nothing more._

_Run the risk of severe emotional trauma. Who knows what they might do or say after the event. Very risky. _

_To test our hypothesis, we have ascertained a very simple plan. We are each going to investigate one of the genders. One member from each house has been chosen to perform the experiment upon. I, Hermione Granger, will be dealing with the female populace. Ginevra Weasley will be dealing with the male. Each encounter will not only give us evidence of sexual prowess, but will also require great tactical thinking, and we may have to employ our absolute best techniques of seduction. Let the games begin!_

_Sexual Hit List:_

_Ginevra Weasley:_

_Gryffindor : Harry Potter_

_Hufflepuff: Cedric Diggory_

_Ravenclaw: Terry Boot_

_Slytherin: Draco Malfoy_

_Hermione Granger:_

_Gryffindor: Lavender Brown_

_Hufflepuff: Susan Bones_

_Ravenclaw: Padma Patil_

_Slytherin: Pansy Parkinson_

Once finished their plan, the two girls bid each other goodnight and climbed the staircase to their dorms. Each one was silently planning how they would go about their first conquest. Harry Potter and Lavender Brown.

To Be Continued…

_A.N._

_Let me know if you like the idea, and I shall continue! I'll probably continue anyway actually. Just for my own entertainment. I know this chapter is a little dull etc, but hey, I had to set the scene! Leave a review, pretty please :) xx Poink!_


	2. Ginny vs Harry : Part I

_**Disclaimer: **I don't own any of the Harry Potter characters or anything else related to the Harry Potter world. They belong to JK Rowling. I apologise to her for using them to such nefarious ends._

_**A.N:** This chapter proved to be much harder to write than the first, because I'm not really sure what direction I want to take this in. Sigh. And I've never really written anything funny before, so I sorely hope that I don't disappoint…Thank you to everyone who reviewed, I was surprised to hear so much positive feedback:) It means a lot, so really, thanks! Especially to Serenity, who hit my soft spot with cookies. Anyway, on with the show, and all that._

**HOUSE UNITY**

Chapter Two

Ginny vs. Harry

Part One.

She knew this would be difficult. Not as difficult as Draco Malfoy would be, considering who she was. _Although_, she pondered, _from what I've heard, he'd shag anything…_Harry, however. Well, he was another matter altogether. Now in his seventh year at Hogwarts, Ginny knew that Harry had _some_ experience in the worldly ways of women. She had even heard some very positive things. No, it wasn't the actual sex she was worried about. It was getting him to do it that might be the problem. She knew Harry. He was not the type to just sleep with a girl for the hell of it. Ginny hated the idea, but she might very well just have to string him along. Unless of course the idea of being with her actually repulsed him, in which case she would just have to find another willing Gryffindor. But nobody in this house epitomised Gryffindor quite like Harry did. It was with these thoughts that Ginny settled into her bed for a good nights sleep, in preparation for the supreme seduction she would have to commit to tomorrow at Hogsmeade.

_That's it!_

Her eyes flying open in comprehension, Ginny suddenly knew _exactly_ how to get Harry into bed. It was the oldest trick in the book! Slyly she thought her new plan to herself. _I'm going to get Harry Potter absolutely rat arsed._

* * *

It was the morning of Hogsmeade, and Ginny had arisen spectacularly early in order to prepare for the day ahead. She had a great deal to organise. The first task of the day was to send an owl to her brothers. Snatching up a quill and parchment from her bedside table, she jotted down a quick note which she hoped would do the trick.

_To my illustrious brothers, Gred and Forge,_

_I am writing with regards to that which you offered me before my departure to this 6th year of my education. I feel that it is time I upheld my family name and tradition. I am hoping to complete the ceremony this evening. Take into account my nature, and please send enough… encouragement… for my night. _

_Lovingly and expectantly, _

_Gin x_

There. That should be alright. If anybody who wasn't meant to see it got their hands on it, it looked innocent enough. Walking to the owlery, Ginny began mentally rifling through her wardrobe, in hope that she could find some appropriate attire for the day.

* * *

Hermione lay in bed thinking about Ginny's task. She knew that the girl had always harboured feelings for Harry. Who wouldn't? He was six foot tall, had that lovely dark messy hair, captivating eyes, and a foppish grin that would melt any heart. _Well, _she thought, _I don't harbour feelings for Harry. Maybe if he had breasts...stop. Stop that thought right now, Hermione._ She gave a slight shudder at her line of thought, and dragged her mind back to Ginny's plans. How on earth does one get Harry Potter, the boy made of all things good and light, true Gryffindor to the core, into bed? Hermione knew two things. One was that if anybody could seduce Harry, then Ginny could. She was a master at seduction. The other was that it was going to be _very_ funny to watch.

* * *

Harry Potter was sat in the Gryffindor common room waiting for his friends. His mind was weighed down with many troubles, the most important of which was his hunger. _Where are they all? I'm starving down here._ The second most important was that his godfather, Sirius, kept nagging him to "Get some lovin'." It wasn't that Harry didn't want some "loving" as Sirius diplomatically called it. It was more that he didn't know anybody who would be willing to love him. He was a hard bloke to be with. Pesky Dark Lords had a habit of trying to kill him. Often. Very unfortunate situation for a young bachelor to find himself in. _Sigh._ _Maybe I should just go get laid. Yeah right. Likely, Potter. Keep dreaming._ If only he knew the irony of his thoughts.

"Harry!" He received a sharp poke in the middle of his head, and broke from his reverie, looking up at the poker. It was Ginny Weasley, and she looked slightly amused for some reason.

"Fantasising, Potter?" She said, in what she knew was a slightly lusty drawl. _Oh Merlin, I sound just like Malfoy. Yeah, well done Ginny, that'll really get him going._ She fought the urge to roll her eyes at herself, and focused her attention back on the surprised boy in front of her. He looked dazed again.

"Um—er. Sort of. Ah. Where are the others?" Harry finally managed to sputter out. He was somewhat distracted by the red head. To be more precise, he was distracted by the fact that from where he sat, his eyes were directly level with her breasts. _Breasts? Ginny has breasts. When did that happen? Where did they come from? Why am I still looking! Stop it Harry!_

"My face is up here, Harry. Hermione was still in bed last I saw. We were up late…" Her voice had a slightly amused quality to it, and she silently congratulated herself on her choice of outfit. She was dressed in a simple, yet attractive style. Her jeans were dark, hugged her hips and thighs, and were slightly flared and the bottom. She coupled these with a pair of silver glitter flip-flops. On her top half she wore a simple green vest which clung to her petite curves nicely. It was not overstated or promiscuous. Just a little more revealing than usual. As Harry appeared to have noticed. She cleared her throat, and he finally looked up at her, a blush creeping across his face.

"Er, well. Why don't we just head to breakfast, yeh? We can meet the others down there, then set off to Hogsmeade?"

Ginny smiled at his offer, e_verything is going to plan, _and graciously offered him a hand to assist him in leaving the comfortable sofa.

Harry watched with horror as Ginny climbed through the portrait whole. Horror at what his mind was thinking. _Holy crap. Where did THOSE curves come from? What's she been hiding under all those baggy clothes? I knew she was pretty, but crikey, I'd like to get my hands on that- Ron's going to kill me. I knew I should have taken up occlumency… _

Ginny broke the odd silence, during which Harry had appeared to have been fighting an internal battle with himself.

"So, looking forward to the party tonight?"

Harry looked confused. It was a look that was becoming evermore frequent upon his face.

"There's a party tonight?"

Ginny's eyes widened.

"Harry, _please_ tell me that you haven't forgotten."

Harry racked his brain trying to remember why there would be a party. He was drawing a blank.

"Er—"

"Harry!" Ginny all but shrieked, "It's Ron's birthday party!"

Harry blanched. _Shit! Ron's birthday! Shit! How did I forget! Good job it's a Hogsmeade weekend…_

"Ginny, you've got to help me get a present for him. He's 18. That's a big one. Oh god, how did I forget?"

Ginny smiled warmly at him, making a butterfly burst into dance in his stomach.

"Don't worry, Harry. I'll help you with whatever you need."

**A.N.**_ Well there's another one. I was going to make it longer, but figured I might as well just upload and make it faster. I was going to have each 'conquest' done in one chapter. But that would be a bit... well... unbelievable,I suppose. Can have a bit more fun this way. Anwyay, review and I shall smile :)_


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